In which the actor you’d like to cast redirected you to their agent, and you freaked the f$&* out

She was breathtaking. How did she get into your head and embody the character you’ve so carefully birthed in a cold read? Jesus knows, but she’s the one. And of *course* she feels the same way you do. Of course she has identified your film as her breakthrough moment. She has been thinking of nothing but your screenplay for the last four days since the callback. She’s been awake at night, staring at the ceiling, sweating with anticipation for your film. So you decide to send her the email she’s been dreaming of and you just know it will be the answer to all her fragile prayers.  And so you write:

Dear Fragile Actress,

It is with great honor that I bestow upon you the answer to your prayers: I would like to cast you in the role of “Moira.” I’ve decided to give you this opportunity to grow as a performer, to spread your wings and embrace the space that I create for you. In terms of payment, you will receive a copy of your scenes, bagels on set, and because you are SAG, we have decided to apply for the SAG contract (you’re welcome). Because of this, we will also defer your payment. I would also like to work with you in a safe environment in the form of three days of rehearsals, which are also deferred, in which I will make sure you know your lines and that you say them exactly as I say them in my head, and make you do the scene a million times even though we all know that the fleeting moments that happen in front of the camera are all that really matter, but I have worked exclusively in the theater world and I’m not really familiar with the differences between film and theater, but none of this matters because I am brilliant. I am thrilled to be directing you and look forward to your acceptance of these terms.

Sincerely,
The only one of my graduating class, no, ALL graduating classes that will make it as a big-time director, you have no other possible job prospects, so clearly you’re going to immediately respond yes to all these fantastic offers Smith

No. Do not write this to your actor. In fact, if this is even close to what you were going to write your actor STOP. Let’s take a step back, take a breath, tell our ego to STFU, and re-assess.

“But I’m the most up-and-coming, ’emerging,’ out-of-the-box 22-year-old director in the world!” you think to yourself.

SEND.

You sent it. Five minutes go by. No response from your actress. A day goes by, nothing. She must be dead, right? Finally she gets back to you with this response:

Dear Phenom Director,

Thank you very much for offering me the role. I am very excited to work with you. In terms of pay rate and schedule, my agent will be reaching out to you shortly. Looking forward to making the film with you.

Sincerely,
Hardworking, professional actor Jones

Holy. Sh*t. No f&*king way. Who does this priss think she is? She should be thankful you offered her the role, even if you’re the one who desperately wants her to be in the film, and out of all the actors you auditioned, you chose her. She should be kissing your feet.

Thirty minutes go by, and you get this email from her agent.

Dear Phenom Director, 

Glad you’ve chosen Hardworking professional actor Jones for your film. We would like to clarify her day rate, which is the SAG minimum $125/day + 10%, and the day rate for rehearsals. When you have production dates set, please let me know and we’ll schedule her. Looking forward to working with you.

Sincerely,
Totally reputable and reasonable talent agent Myers

At this point, you explode. Physically explode. Like guts and brains everywhere explode. Here you thought you were going to have an artist-to-artist mutual love for your script, that this woman would be so enamored with your masterpiece that she would give up weeks of her life for you, and she refers you to her agent!?!?!?!  What a heartless bitch. What an ego maniac. Doesn’t she realize that you have the upper hand because you are doing her a favor by giving her this role, and it is not the case that negotiations are reasonable here because there was never any intention of bringing any business elements into this project, and that the clips she was going to get from this project — not to mention THE BAGELS — are worth more than fair pay standards, and that she was going to take those clips and get discovered by Hollywood and become a star, and then she would come crying back to you one day, dropping to her knees, thanking you for giving her the chance to be in your film? Did she not realize all that?!?!?!

Dear director (and if you don’t have a producer, or your producer somehow thinks the way you do, get a legitimate producer, or fire that awful producer), this actor has every right and responsibility to discuss project hiring details with her agent.

For one, if she is signed exclusively to her agent, any work that she gets — even if it is an audition she got by herself and not through her agent — she has to pay her agent commission. The agent’s responsibility to the actor is to negotiate the best possible deal for the actor. If you really want to work with this actor, then the negotiated deal will be a win-win. She will be paid fairly, and you will pay what you deem her to be worth. If you deem her to be worth bagels, then chances are your production is not mature enough to shoot. If you at all think you are doing an actor a favor, and that you are being generous in hire said actor, then you need to go back to the casting phase, and find the actor worth paying.

Secondly, understand that the further up your career goes, the more you will be talking with agents. And I’m not talking just actors here. I’m talking screenwriter agents, DP agents, composer agents… pretty much everyone. Hell, you’ll probably want an agent at some point as a director. In any case, understand that this actor has chosen this field as a career, and as such should ensure that her work is properly compensated.

Thirdly, don’t get all squirmy when it comes to negotiations. I know you got into this for the art, but there is a VERY strong business component in film, and you better get used to it now or you’ll never survive.

Finally, don’t take it personally. Don’t let your ego tell you that she’s trying to take advantage of you. Don’t ask “who does she think she is?” Remember that she, too, probably wants distance from the business aspect of this — that’s why she hired an agent. Just get the numbers locked up so you can work on the art. And rest easy that if she didn’t like the project, she just would have said no thank you.

And for crying out loud, stop putting “food” anywhere near the word “compensation.” 

 

In which you decided to not pay (or defer pay to) your actors

I get it. You’re making a movie with – like – *no* budget. My god, what a crazy thing to do. No one has ever done this before. What are you going to do?  OH, here’s a great idea. Don’t pay the people who are going to make or break your ability to tell your story.  After all, actors are the most desperate people in the biz. They’ll do anything, right? And they don’t have any equipment to bring in, and most of the time they’re just sitting on set not doing anything, while the rest of us are moving machines around and wearing carpenter pants, why should they get paid?  They should be HONORED to be in my movie.

Only now you’ve “hired” unprofessional actors, and/or you’ve belittled your actors by not treating them as professionals, and you’ve enabled them to lose a piece of their integrity, and you’ve assumed they are plug-and-play robots that will just show up and grovel at your feet, and… oh crap. Why aren’t they behaving professionally on your set?  Why do they have a glint of “if I just get through this crappy movie, I’ll get something on my reel and finally get to do REAL movies” behind their eyes?  Your movie shows that you didn’t work with professionals. It shows that you didn’t value the craft they brought to the set enough to give them a few bucks.  And before you say, what craft? They’re beginners, they’re just lucky to have been chosen — THINK.  You held an audition session, and you CHOSE THEM. So they must hold some value, right?

Now obviously, I’m not talking about situations where you and your friends decide to make a flick, and everyone pitches in a few bucks for beer, and you run the camera and do your thang.  That’s a fun, creative, social experience. I’m not talking about student films, because that’s a learning experience, and the actors you’re using are learning their craft as well.  I’m talking about when you are producing a movie that you intend to showcase with the goal of furthering your career as a filmmaker. I’m talking about when you have a producer (even if it’s you) going to vendors (even if they’re people you happen to be friends with) and creating a budget (even if it’s minuscule).  In that budget should be pay for your hired actors.

Now some of you may be thinking — wait a second. My actors weren’t paid and they did an amazing job. Or — wait a second. I’m an unpaid actor and I acted my heart and soul out on that flick. Fine. But then make honest people of yourselves. Dear filmmaker, you are past the stage of student films. You are making films to display your vision publicly. You are making films to get on a bigger, better stage every time. Eventually, you will have to pay your actors, so just get used to that budget line now. The business aspect of this is inevitable. Accept it. You need to put money out there to see more of it in the future.

My favorite is when I see castings listed as “Paid” but it’s really deferred pay.  Let me put this right out there. “Deferred pay” means the actor is going to see zero dollars. Because we all know your seven-minute movie isn’t going to make money. At least be honest about what that really means.

Many people will look at the SAG-AFTRA rates and say, “Gee, if SAG-AFTRA allows deferred pay under these contracts, then that must mean I should defer pay.” WRONG. SAG-AFTRA puts that in there to encourage filmmakers to use Union actors, but it doesn’t mean it’s a wise decision that will make your film better.

So what to pay?  Well, the minimum daily rate for Union contracts that require pay is $100.  Think about that.  One Hundred Measly Dollars to make sure the Face that will Tell Your Story feels respected enough to Tell Your Story Right.

How to find that money?  Guys, seriously? We have so many crowdfunding opportunities nowadays.  IndieGoGo, Kickstarter, RocketHub, Peerbackers… Pick one and hustle.

Take care of your actors.  Feed them. Pay them. Help them with transport. Bring your pride down. If you chose them, then you consider them an integral and invaluable part of your project. It means you cannot make your film without them. It mean they are just as important as any piece of equipment, any crew member, any pizza you order. For crying out loud, show them that you know that.  The magic they will make for you is priceless.

And yes, this goes both ways. Actors need to learn to keep their integrity and resist doing every non-paying gig out there.  Such a level of desperation will just bring everyone down.  But that’s for another post…

In which you hired an actor who sucks

You did your job. You booked a studio, got a video camera with a tripod. You settled yourself into your seat for 2 hours of auditions.  And then she walks in. She’s exactly what you had pictured. Button nose, butterfly eyes, and wait… what’s that… her monologue was recited with the pointed, timed precision of someone who just finished conservatory?  BINGO!  You just cast your female lead! Only you forgot to have her do a cold read of your work or something similar, nor did you do a chemistry read with your leading man, and now you’re on set shooting your movie after you slaved and struggled to raise as much money as you possibly could, and you have an entire crew assembled, and all eyes on her — SHE SUCKS.

What happened? You forgot that, these days, monologues don’t matter for your film/webseries/pilot etc.  You need to throw the material at your auditionees and see if they embody the character pretty much off the bat.  Ever see an audition for network TV?  It’s efficient. They don’t want to see a girl recite something she memorized for her 1st year conservatory showcase. They don’t care about that story or those characters.  Those TV show creators want to see their characters brought to life here and now. That’s it. And to throw the actors a bone, I have yet to meet an actor who is elated when they have to do a monologue for an audition.* Why? Actors want to play as much as they possibly can. They too want to bring new characters to life. It excites them. They want to connect with YOU, the casting director. They want to please. And because doing a monologue doesn’t give them that opportunity, you will not see all that they can do for you.

And frankly, every time I see a film/webseries/pilot is seeing monologues, my confidence that production knows what they’re doing decreases substantially. It suggests production is out of touch, and good actors don’t bother with those productions.

*Theater aside, of course. That’s a whole other beast I don’t deal with here.

In which I explain the purpose of this blog

Filmmaking (to include TV, web series, etc.) is a dirty, filthy business, but one that is a necessity for many of us because we love it more than anything. It is also an easy path to insanity, greed, resentment, and overall losing your cool.  The level of dirtiness could vary by location (New York and LA being the dirtiest by virtue of volume), but I do believe it is useful to talk about some of the pitfalls of “the biz” in general.  This blog aims to address a wide variety of opportunities for disgrace and generally douchebaggery to arise, and ways you can manage them.  If you feel an issue is missing, please write me about it, and I will attempt to address them.  The overall mission is to introduce a bit of reality and humanity back into your filmmaking world to make the process less abhorrent to all.  This is a place for directors, writers, producers, actors, crew, really anyone who has to work on a set, bless your hearts.